OCD, "The woman who can't forget" click here

Poems of FRIENDSHIP.

OCD criteria explained in this youtube video. Click here

"Elephant in the living room" as defined by wikipedia:
The elephant in the room (also elephant in the living room, elephant in the parlor, elephant in the corner, elephant on the dinner table, elephant in the kitchen, elephant on the coffee table, and horse in the corner) is an English idiom for an obvious truth that is being ignored or goes unaddressed. It is based on the idea that an elephant in a room would be impossible to overlook; thus, people in the room who pretend the elephant is not there might be concerning themselves with relatively small and even irrelevant matters, compared to the looming big one. ......
The following is by John Carcerano "A New Journey"
When crises or hard to handle matters strike and effect families they often choose to silently acknowledge them, but also ignore them. This is known as "The family silent secret".
When a family is faced with the addiction of a mom or dad, brother or sister it is usually acknowledged in secrecy. This is usually the case when they are unable to treat or "cure" the problem. So quiet acknowledgment is a way of blocking and defending the issue from the outside world. Mental illness carries with it a raw, cold hard stigma which should not exist in the first place. People seem to think that mental illness is a rare and hardly ever seen disorder. People are shunned when it is found out they are a sufferer. But why? 1 in 5 have a mental illness and 1 in 3 have an addiction and nearly every family and everyone is affected by the addict. So why all the secrecy from family members? Good question. Families would find they are much better off to address this "elephant in their living room". But a few good reasons why it is not addressed is because families do not know how to properly address them and also the family member in question may rebel and leave or completely abandon the house hold if too much pressure is put on them to "change" or "get treated". So the family chooses to be in denial about the situation or just enables it for the safety and shelter of the loved one involved.

The problem with addiction is that families and most people in general do not know how to treat problems such as alcohol and drug addiction or mental illness because they are such complex illnesses.

Complex situations that cannot be handled or dealt with are then swept under the rug. "A New Journey" Is here to help you learn to properly deal with these situations that most plague the family. The family must first look through the stigma because mental illness and addiction are very common illnesses. The problem is that most people themselves do not properly recognize or admit to having an addiction or an illness, thus this ignorance and misunderstanding causes and feeds this unnecessary and unwarranted stigma. remember to deal with things head on and with dignity.

If your family has an elephant in it's living room there is plenty you can do about it other than taking the easy way out and ignoring it. Stop the continued damage it causes and take action, contact a counselor or mental health professional and "talk about and discuss" your families issues so that it won't destroy the health of those around the suffering loved one.
You can get free counseling and support by contacting your states social service agency and get the help, education and guidance you need to make the situation right. This blog along with the e-zines I am writing are all designed to help you help yourself or your loved one to end the suffering and trauma associated with addiction and mental illness. Click here for links to all 50 states social service agencies.

More links on dealing with denial
Dealing and understanding how denial stops progress

by John Carcerano
The first thing you do is call someone else who has recovered from alcoholism or drug addiction themselves. The plan of action they may have or the philosophy on life they hold may not be the same as yours but right now that does not matter. What they can offer you is solitude, guidance and refuge from using again. They are someone who has been there and suffered just like you have, but they have gotten well and they support you in that he/she wants the same for you. You cannot go near the people you hang with or the places you always hangout at. That is an instant environment for you to continue using. If there is no one you know that has achieved recovery with whom you can go visit then look up your nearest AA general service office. They are staffed 24 hours a day 7 days a week by a caring and understanding ex addict who will immediately contact someone from your local area to come pick you up and get to a meeting. If you dread the thought of a "meeting" or are not religious and do not want to participate in a "gospel hour" then don't worry, because there are no gospel hours held at AA/NA closed meetings. They are made up of men and women from all walks of life who have suffered just like you are suffering now. They won't judge you or say under their breath when walk in "oh God, here comes another loser"If you think they will then you are sadly mistaken. You must open your mind and let these wonderful people into your world, because they will show you their world of sobriety and a better calm. I was very lost and depressed, as my world came crashing down on me one day and I knew that I just had to quit drinking hard alcohol everyday around the clock. I was scared to go to that meeting but I was also destroyed and felt hopeless inside and knew no other way to turn my hell around. I jumped into that first meeting head first. When it was my turn to talk I just rocked back in my chair and gazed out not really looking anyone in the eyes and just spilled my trouble. I said it like it was. "I was in financial trouble and drinking everyday, morning noon and night, 2 to 4 half pints of hard liquor a day and living in a world where I felt depressed and hopeless. I just had to quit cause it is destroying me". I went numb as i spoke and really did not know what anyone could do for me just because I was spilling my pathetic guts of what a loser I felt I was. Well when that meeting ended, a school friend of mine whom I did not even know was there had handed me a list that was passed around the room which had the names and phone numbers of about 30 people on it. That list and the support it had brought me at my most vulnerable time became a life saver for me. I called those numbers every night for the first few weeks of recovery. If I had not had those numbers I would have gone out and got booze. I have had periods before, during and after I found recovery where times would get very trying, stressful and uncertain, and it was at these times I found the solace of others with my same addiction and recovery issues was a very welcome sight to calm my fluttering and anxiety ridden mind. Even if you are not very religious it also helps to stop into a church for the aura, love and kindness that can be found there. But when you feel your world is crashing in and you need to end your addiction, it;s important to surround yourself only with those who are in recovery from addiction, or stay home alone and talk on the phone with these people until the need to use or drink has subsided, until you tire and feel the need to go sleep. Remember that you can't use drugs or alcohol while you are sleeping and the thing to know is that you must just get through your day until night comes, then sleep time is safe time. If you are having trouble falling asleep then cut out all caffeine from your daily diet and try a gentle over the counter sedative if you must. But be very careful you do not become addicted to pills in order to sleep at night. When you are newly into your recovery the body can be very disrupted for at least the first several so agitation and sleeplessness will probably be an early issue for you. But once you are through the first few weeks of relieving your body from the constant onslaught of toxic chemicals, then as your body is readjusting, it will naturally become more serene and calmer. There are more issues to look out for as you eliminate the effects of drugs and alcohol on your mind and body. You will need to see if there are any underlying issues such as anxiety or depression that may have been one of the root causes to your vulnerability to become addicted in the first place. I don't want to confuse you here, so just take things one step at a time. The first year of your recovery will be one in which you get to re know yourself much better than you may have ever realized before. This is good. "A New Journey" hopes to be able to help guide you as you navigate from your world of addiction, into a new and wonderful world of sobriety and serenity. And it is indeed a wonderful thing, recovery.
:Remember this: When you need help quitting an addiction just reach out to someone in the addiction recovery field or an ex addict, you will be surprised at the help that is out there for you.

Amazing Grace Lyrics

"Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound,
That saved a wretch like me....
I once was lost but now am found,
Was blind, but now, I see.



T'was Grace that taught...
my heart to fear.
And Grace, my fears relieved.
How precious did that Grace appear...
the hour I first believed.



Through many dangers, toils and snares...
we have already come.
T'was Grace that brought us safe thus far...
and Grace will lead us home.



The Lord has promised good to me...
His word my hope secures.
He will my shield and portion be...
as long as life endures.



When we've been here ten thousand years...
bright shining as the sun.
We've no less days to sing God's praise...
then when we've first begun.



"Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound,
That saved a wretch like me....
I once was lost but now am found,
Was blind, but now, I see.

"People with Mental Illness Enrich Our Lives"

Information about famous people throughout history who have had a serious mental illness.

Abraham Lincoln
The revered sixteenth President of the United States suffered from severe and incapacitating depressions that occasionally led to thoughts of suicide, as documented in numerous biographies by Carl Sandburg.

Virginia Woolf
The British novelist who wrote To the Lighthouse and Orlando experienced the mood swings of bipolar disorder characterized by feverish periods of writing and weeks immersed in gloom. Her story is discussed in The Dynamics of Creation by Anthony Storr.

Lionel Aldridge
A defensive end for Vince Lombardi's legendary Green Bay Packers of the 1960's, Aldridge played in two Super Bowls. In the 1970's, he suffered from schizophrenia and was homeless for two and a half years. Until his death in 1998, he gave inspirational talks on his battle against paranoid schizophrenia. His story is the story of numerous newspaper articles.

Eugene O'Neill
The famous playwright, author of Long Day's Journey Into Night and Ah, Wilderness!, suffered from clinical depression, as documented in Eugene O'Neill by Olivia E. Coolidge.

Ludwig van Beethoven
The brilliant composer experienced bipolar disorder, as documented in The Key to Genius: Manic Depression and the Creative Life by D. Jablow Hershman and Julian Lieb.

Gaetano Donizetti
The famous opera singer suffered from bipolar disorder, as documented in Donizetti and the World Opera in Italy, Paris and Vienna in the First Half of the Nineteenth Century by Herbert Weinstock.

Robert Schumann
The "inspired poet of human suffering" experienced bipolar disorder, as discussed in The Dynamics of Creation by Anthony Storr.

Leo Tolstoy
Author of War and Peace, Tolstoy revealed the extent of his own mental illness in the memoir Confession. His experiences is also discussed in The Dynamics of Creation by Anthony Storr and The Inner World of Mental Illness: A Series of First Person Accounts of What It Was Like by Bert Kaplan.

Vaslov Nijinsky
The dancer's battle with schizophrenia is documented in his autobiography, The Diary of Vaslov Nijinksy.

John Keats
The renowned poet's mental illness is documented in The Dynamics of Creation by Anthony Storr and The Broken Brain: The biological Revolution in Psychiatry by Nancy Andreasen, M.D.

Tennessee Williams
The playwright gave a personal account of his struggle with clinical depression in his own Memoirs. His experience is also documented in Five O'Clock Angel: Letters of Tennessee Williams to Maria St. Just, 1948-1982; The Kindness of Strangers: The Life of Tennessee Williams by Donald Spoto, and Tennessee: Cry of the Heart by Dotson.

Vincent Van Gogh
The celebrated artist's bipolar disorder is discussed in The Key to Genius: Manic Depression and the Creative Life by D. Jablow Hershman and Julian Lieb and Dear Theo, The Autobiography of Van Gogh.

Isaac Newton
The scientist's mental illness is discussed in The Dynamics of Creation by Anthony Storr and The Key to Genius: Manic Depression and the Creative Life by D. Jablow Hershman and Julian Lieb.

Ernest Hemingway
The Pulitzer Prize-winning novelist's suicidal depression is examined in the True Gen: An Intimate Portrait of Ernest Hemingway by Those Who Knew Him by Denis Brian.

Sylvia Plath
The poet and novelist ended her lifelong struggle with clinical depresion by taking own life, as reported in A Closer Look at Ariel: A Memory of Sylvia Plath by nancy Hunter-Steiner.

Michelangelo
The mental illness of one of the world's greatest artistic geniuses is discussed in The Dynamics of Creation by Anthony Storr.

Winston Churchill
"Had he been a stable and equable man, he could never have inspired the nation. In 1940, when all the odds were against Britain, a leader of sober judgment might well have concluded that we were finished," wrote Anthony Storr about Churchill's bipolar disorder in Churchill's Black Dog, Kafka's Mice, and Other Phenomena of the Human Mind.

Vivien Leigh
The Gone with the Wind star suffered from mental illness, as documented in Vivien Leigh: A Biography by Ann Edwards.

Jimmy Piersall
The baseball player for the Boston Red Sox who suffered from bipolar disorder detailed his experience in The Truth Hurts.

Patty Duke
The Academy Award-winning actress told of her bipolar disorder in her autobiography and made-for-TV move Call Me Anna and A Brilliant Madness: Living with Manic-Depressive Illness, co-authored by Gloria Hochman.

Charles Dickens
One of the greatest authors in the English language suffered from clinical depression, as documented in The Key to Genius: Manic Depression and the Creative Life by D. Jablow Hershman and Julian Lieb, and Charles Dickens: His Tragedy and Triumph by Edgar Johnson.

about why AA works. Just the fact that you stay away from the people, places and hangouts where you used to use, and groups like AA give you a place to go where you can form a bond with others who share your struggles and experiences....Here are the 12 steps;

Alcoholics Anonymous - Page 58
CHAPTER 5 HOW IT WORKS

RARELY HAVE we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path. Those who do not recover are people who cannot or will not completely give themselves to this simple program, usually men and women who are constitutionally incapable of being honest with themselves. There are such unfortunates. They are not at fault; they seem to have been born that way. They are naturally incapable of grasping and developing a manner of living which demands rigorous honesty. Their chances are less than average. There are those, too, who suffer from grave emotional and mental disorders, but many of them do recover if they have the capacity to be honest.

Our stories disclose in a general way what we used to be like, what happened, and what we are like now. If you have decided that you want what we have and are willing to go to any length to get it - then you are ready to take certain steps.

At some of these we balked. We thought that we could find an easier, softer way. But we could not. With all earnestness at our command, we beg of you to be fearless and thorough from the very start. Some of us have tried to hold on to our old ideas and the result was nil until we let go absolutely.

Remember that we deal with alcohol - cunning, baffling, powerful! Without help it is too much for us. But there is One who has all power - that One is God. May you find him now.

Half measures availed us nothing. We stood at the turning point. We asked His protection and care with complete abandon.

Here are the steps we took, which are suggested as a program of recovery:

1. We admitted we were powerless over alcohol - that our lives had become unmanageable.

2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.

4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.

6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.

7. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.

8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.

9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.

10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.

11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.

12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

Many of us exclaimed, "What an order! I can't go through with it." Do not be discouraged. No one among us has been able to maintain anything like perfect adherence to these principles. We are not saints. The point is, that we were willing to grow along spiritual lines. The principles we have set down are guides to progress. We claim spiritual progress rather than spiritual perfection.

Our description of the alcoholic, the chapter of the agnostic, and our personal adventures before and after make clear three pertinent ideas:

(a) That we were alcoholic and could not manage our own lives.
(b) That probably no human power could have relieved our alcoholism.
(c) That God could and would if He were sought.

© From the Book - Alcoholics Anonymous

by John Carcerano
such a sad, tough and lonely world at times, why bring pain to one another cause it really does not have to be that way. LOOK, THINK and ACT differently as you travel on this road of life, and remember that sometimes you have to yield to others less fortunate or to those who are truly much weaker than you are. There are no road signs along the way through this road, so think carefully and sometimes thoughtfully as you journey on by, and remember that kindness and attention to others will make your journey more peaceful and calmer as we journey through this often hard world,..together. by john carcerano, for you.

by John Carcerano
When you're 4 years old you look at a 20 year old as real real old. But in reality there is only a 16 year difference in the two. The way a 50 year old looks at the time span of 16 years is much different than the way a 4 year old looks at it. When you are alive for 4 years it seems like a long time because you do not remember what it felt like to be around before that, because you did not exist so you therefore could not feel. To a 4 year old 16 years is 4 times the years of their age. So that's a long time. to a 20 year old being 4 again is going back a long ways, but not as long as the perspective a 4 year old has about being 20. To a 50 year old, 16 years means only about one third of their age. The years from 2 on up to 9 just seem to go on forever, as do the years of 9 through to about 18. I think being forced to listen to authority telling you how to do things along with the drawn out years of having to go school (which never seem to end) make adolescence drag on slowly. In our lives major changes seem to happen every 5 to 7 years. Major changes such as sicknesses, deaths, marriages, divorces, tragedies, moving etc. If you look back at your life you will see that every five to seven years your life was massively different due to changes both within and beyond your control. At age 20 you feel strong, vigorous, youthful and you have a full head of dark rich colored hair. At 21 you start to know that your not a teenager anymore, and that reality sets in as each new birthday goes on. By 30, you still feel like your in your early 20's, but by 32 or 33 you start to fret 40 and reality sets in that you are no longer 20 nor will you ever be again. By 35 or 38, 40 seems like a time that will never or better never come. You look to it with dread. At 35 you notice a few gray hairs and you reject them by promptly pulling them out. Thus you tell yourself that your "not gray yet, how did those get here"? And you still feel very youthful. But as 39 creeps up you start to feel very much different inside. You think about being 10 years old again, the time when your mother and father were 40 years old themselves. Now you start to worry that you indeed are getting old. You know the years truly are passing but you now begin to fight it and look for meaning in it all. Your once youthful face now has a small line or two underneath your eyes. You finally do turn 40 and you finally start to feel that you are indeed getting older whether you like it or not. This stage of life is called 'The big reality stage". more to come on this analysis and how your addiction is influenced by these factors ...............

By John Carcerano
Your new to recovery and after a proper assessment from your psychiatrist you are told you need medication. Don't rebel and refuse this evaluation but just make sure you can go see another doctor for another evaluation. If you are broke and cannot afford a psychiatrist do as I have always recommended before and contact your state department of human services and tell them your situation. Most, if not all states will be able to get you some state sponsored care for little or no money. But don't be ashamed to need medication for a psychological disorder. 1 in 5 need psychiatric medication for one condition or another. Just most don't recognize it or they are in denial about their condition or they just don't care and go without the medication they need. Your mind and your body is now free from the influences and mood swings that were associated with your past chemical use. It is only when you are free from those influences that you are able to be properly assessed by an experienced therapist/psychiatrist. The real you is now emerging and with that comes the understanding of why you were drawn to the relief drugs and alcohol had on your mind. Take the medication if you must. If you're afraid of the stigma associated with having to take psychiatric medicne then don't tell anyone that you are on medication. Don't concern yourself about what others think, concern yourself only with getting better and taking care of yourself. Just because you quit your vice does not mean that your problems are over. You need to address the "dry drunk/addict" in you. The person you were just before you began using is the one that for some reason was physically, psychologically and physiologically drawn to chemical addiction. Quitting your vice is the first major big step, that means you recognize that you want to change, now you have to get well, stay well and keep away from the influences that attracted you to addiction in the first place.

LAUGH>>LAUGH>>LAUGH!

How many Irish does it take to change a light bulb?
Twenty One. One to hold the bulb and twenty to drink until the room spins.

This really drunk guy walks up to a parking meter and puts in a quarter. He stares at the needle that has stopped at 60 and exclaims, "I can't believe I lost 100 pounds!"

What's the difference between a bar and a g-spot?
Most men have no trouble finding a bar.

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder...

Two blondes walk into the bar....You'd think one of them would of seen it!

What would you call a drunk who works at an upholstery shop?
A recovering alcoholic.

Two friends were out drinking when suddenly one lurched backward off his barstool and lay motionless on the floor. "One thing about Jim," his buddy said to the bartender, "He knows when to stop."

A baby seal walks into a bar and sits down. "What can I get you?" asked the bartender. "Anything but a Canadian Club" replied the seal.

A five-dollar bill walks into a bar. Bartender says, "Get outta here! We don't serve your type. This is a singles bar."

A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says: "Pint please, and one for the road."

There was a guy who had at least 4-5 drinks of whiskey every day of his adult life. When he died, they cremated him, and it took two days to put out the fire!

Where does an Irish family go on vacation?
A different bar.

What is the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral?
One less drunk.

Three old ladies are walking down the street. They are hard of hearing.
One: "Whew, it's windy today!"
Two: "No. Today's Thursday!"
Three: "So am I! Let's go to a bar!

Laugh a little it helps!

Bar Joke

Alcoholic Side Effects

The FDA is considering additional warnings on beer and alcohol bottles, such as: WARNING: consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not. WARNING: consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like an a-hole. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the same boring story over and over again until your friends want to SMASH YOUR HEAD IN. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to thay shings like thish. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at 4 in the morning. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your pants. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in the morning and see something really scary (whose species and or name you can't remember). WARNING: consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, handsomer and smarter than some really, really big guy named Chuck. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are invisible. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause an influx in the time-space continuem, whereby small (and sometimes large) gaps of time may seem to literally disappear". WARNING: consumption of alcohol may actually CAUSE pregnancy.

by John Carecerano

The next time you carelessly throw away a candy wrapper, cigarette butt, coffee cup or some type of garbage please think again and don't. Throw your garbage in the a refuse can. I used to be the biggest litterer around. I would throw junk and garbage on the street just out of my disdain for society, or just to show my hate for the local government. Well these people who have to pick up all the trash on the street are mostly re-habilitating ex-cons or recovering addicts just trying to get a new foothold on their lives. Tonia Dunbar whom I have chronicled in my blogs was briefly employed as a trash gatherer for the city of Chicago. She was 3 years into her recovery from crack addiction and this was her first real job. Unfortunately she was not ready for steady employment yet and the pressure from this job caused her to briefly re-lapse. It was this experience of hers that caused me to look differently at how and where I throw out my garbage. I just want to do all I can to help an addict and by throwing paper on the street I am making a recovering addicts life that much more tougher. It is really that I feel I am showing disrespect for a suffering and recovering addict if I would continue to throw my refuse on the ground. My aunt used to take my brother, sister and me out to eat several times a year and when we would go to a restaurant she would always leave a large tip for the waitress. This was back in the 1970's and she would always leave at least a 25% tip. She would always justify this by telling me that my mother used to be a waitress and that waitresses only make like $1.00 an hour. She told me how they depend on their tips for their income. I think the real reason my aunt would leave a large tip for waitresses was because it was somehow her way in showing respect for my mother whom at the time was lost on the streets and homeless due to her losing battle with alcoholism. I will chronicale more about my moms tragic story and the story of other addicts in my soon to be released book "A New Journey". But what is very apparent to me now is how alcoholism effects the very lives of those who are the family members of the addict. It's a daily suffering on the lives of everyone involved in an alcoholic or drug addicts life. Take my aunt for example. I can now remember how she used to always give money to street people. This was her way of trying to reconcile that she had lost a sister, my mother to addiction and the streets. My mother was too sick to play a steady part in our lives and my aunt tried very hard to make this up to us. She would give us $50.00 on our birthday and do the same for us on Christmas and several other times during the year. My aunt did not work, I only found out much later that my aunt was in debt deeply with her credit cards. Through this blog I hope to bring you my heart, my soul, my mind and my experiences with addiction in order to enlighten and help you and your loved ones if your life is effected by alcohol or drug addiction. In my books and writings I try to bring you full circle in your understanding of this most tragic subject, and show you how it doesn't have to be tragic at all. So through my blogs and my writings I feel what you feel and together lets get you the answers you have come for. A new life is not only possible, it will happen. That is my goal.

Anyone have some advice? I think I'm depressed..?

Additional Details

well i dont know how to explain the thoughts really. i just keep thinking about things. like how bad i feel usually. and they wont go away. and when i try to sleep, i feel like my mind is working overtime instead of shutting down and letting me relax.

Answered by John Carcerano
There is depression that's for sure.Self esteem issues added to this only amplify your woes. Now, the racing thoughts are another sign in and of itself.The kind of racing thoughts determines a lot about your diagnosis. Are your thoughts rambling and changing constantly or are they intense and logical. How often your thoughts race are important to know. You may just have intensity of thoughts and not racing thoughts. But I do suspect they are racing by the way you described them.Racing thoughts and depression could be a sign of Bipolar. It starts in the teens and young adulthood.You need a full and proper assessment by a good shrink.It's great you are reaching out and asking for help. You don't seem to be in denial about what you do and how you affect people around you. It would also be helpful if you can force yourself to get out on a regular basis even if it's just a ceramics class, the library or to a church gathering. Please keep away from drugs and alcohol because you are highly susceptible to addiction for relief from your racing mind and lower self esteem and depression. Your state can get you to a shrink for free or for just a few dollars out of your pocket. Contact your states social and human service dept.
www.anewjourney.com

by John Carcerano www.anewjourney.com
Last week when I went to sleep I seemed to sleep very well. But I had this dream that seemed to go on forever. I'm John Carcerano, the founder of "A New Journey" and an addiction counselor. I get so tied up with the people who I work with that sometimes I get bothered at the most intrusive hours. I can't turn down any addicts who are reaching out to me for help. My tired body may want to at times, but my mind and my heart won't allow it. Dreams do tell you everything you need to know about yourself, they really do. I had this dream last week that seemed to go on all night. It was a long lasting one . I collect antique furniture and I was visiting this elderly lady who was showing me all the antiques she had accumulated in her home. The whole dream took place in her home as she was showing me her antique collection. As I was being led around her house looking at her antiques, there were pets all over her house. They were dogs, cats, bears , just all sorts of animals some of which I could not even recognize or describe. But as This elderly lady was showing all her things, these animals of hers kept bumping into me,sniffing me, licking me,scratching me,tripping me and just making themselves a pain in the butt. They seemed to come out of nowhere, and there they were,everywhere I was walking. It got scary at times cause I did not know when I was gonna get scratched or bitten. They were in my way as if I was having to walk in a maze to avoid them. The lady kept having to grab my arm and pull me along just to keep up with her. These strange mix of animals just kept bothering and touching me. Like I said, this dream was one that lasted a few hours during my night. I woke up a few times but just slightly enough to fall right back to sleep several times and resume the same bothersome dream. When i finally did wake up for the day, which was around 4:30 am, I really was annoyed at why I had had such annoying and bothersome dream. When I began analyzing it I quickly realized that all the strange animals which kept bugging me as I went along were in fact all of my clients I deal with day in and day out. At this point I do a lot of charity work and the kids I mentor along with the addicts I work with, and their family too, are what I was encountering in my dream. The animals bugging me were in fact my clients in real life. Instead of running out of the elderly lady's home, I stayed there and was kind to the bothersome animals. I had done in my dream just as I do in my real life, I stayed and put up with all the animals. In real life I know that regardless of what time or what day someone reaches out to me for help, I am there, always. It sort of reminds me of what Bill Wilson calls the main principal of Alcoholics Anonymous. He says, "When someone reaches out for the hand of AA, yours will be there always". My hand is there always, "and for that I am responsible".